Thursday, November 03, 2005

First Aid....of the Future!!

When I mentioned how I got a Star Fleet Medical Manual for Christmas in 1977, a couple of people were curious as to what was inside this incredible futuristic medical book. So here are a few pages for your viewing pleasure. Disclaimer: I am in no way responsible for any adverse physical reactions or psychological episodes that occur due to the viewing of these pages. All parties agree to turn back now or view these medical miracles of their own free will.

Hey everybody, it's a Klingonoid Biped! Until I got this manual, I was unaware that Klingons had smooth genital areas, just like GI Joe and Ken.

If you attach the airplane glue to the bicycle pump, and shove the hose down your throat, you can get a really intense high. Stupid Gorn.....

I'm not sure why they included these sexual positions in the medical manual, but I would have preferred not to know what happens when a desperate lonely spaceman takes advantage of a drunken alien.

How many people are really going to be injured while sitting in a chair? Isn't this procedure a complete waste of time? Plus now it's far more likely that you'll need to figure out how to carry the many injured crewmen who have mistakenly sat on the stick.
I am far more disburbed by the patients enormous nipples than by his horrific burns.

5 comments:

Monkey said...

This is just disturbing.

Riley said...

I laughed pretty hard at this!! I still have my copy of the federation medical manual...somewhere.

http://menooshea.blogspot.com/

Chris Jart said...

Truly disturbing indeed. I'm glad someone else had the interesting, yet useless, medical manual. No one else I knew was into Star Trek, so I couldn't share my new found medical knowledge...until now.

Michael said...

Meeeemories! Wow, thanks for bringing back this one!

Chris Sobieniak said...

Truly disturbing indeed. I'm glad someone else had the interesting, yet useless, medical manual. No one else I knew was into Star Trek, so I couldn't share my new found medical knowledge...until now.
Funny I never heard of this book before (though I was born in '77, so this would've been ahead of my time).